The other day, I "accidentally" watched Raising Hope. Actually, I was in the bathtub, and couldn't reach the remote! Anyway, I found myself halfway watching it. I couldn't tell you the plot, but there was one line at the end that really resonated with me. Someone said, "If you quit dreaming, you're just sleeping". I really like that. Sometimes I get so complacent, just coasting along. On one side, I am really content. On the other, I do sometimes ask if this is all there is. I remember being young, with all kinds of crazy dreams. Obviously, the majority of them didn't come true. I didn't really dream about where I am now, with a husband who adores me and a daughter who still seems to enjoy spending time with me occasionally. I figured that really being happy was an unattainable dream, something I didn't deserve. Am I not being greedy if I ask for more? Next question - what more would I ask for? I've always wanted success, but my definition changes as I get older. Once upon a time, home and family constituted success. Now, I find I want just a little more. There's that pesky word again - more. I think what I mean is better. I want to be a better wife, a better mom, a better friend, a better housekeeper, a better everything. I want to be more creative, better read, more educated. The problem, as I see it, is that it's a whole lot easier to want it than it is to do it. If I don't try to improve myself, I can't fail at it. It's so easy to surround myself with inspirational sayings, yet hard to believe them.
I really ought to serve cheese with all this whine! I guess it's a good thing no one reads this blog. I've never been much of a journal keeper, so this is my substitute.
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